krap, krap, krap,
hier teen my bors.
die bene steek uit,
dis rou.
jy proebeer so hard,
om tussen die ribbes te kom.
maar hierdie hart,
sit in a tronk.
n tronk wat jy gemaak het,
gefonnis vir "life"
om nooit weer uit te kom nie.

hoekom krap jy weer?
so tussen die ribbes,
harde, skurwe fyltjie,
trek en stoot die vleis,
soos jy my nader trek,
en weer weg stoot.

HOU OP! ek kan nie meer,
dit bloei uit my oe,
ek kan nie sien.
dit bloei uit my neus,
ek kan nie asem haal nie.
my mond is droog,
ek wil niks se.
die bloed is taai,
ek voel niks...

dis verby.

who are you?
where do you come from?
who sent you?

i hid so well,
blended, best i could.
what have you done?

chip away,
bit by bit,
i've nothing left.

i can not run,
i can not hide,
will never try.

now i need you,
now that you know me,
i trust you.... x

i look at you,
you smile,
i smile,
i hate you,
you say you're sorry.
i love you...

then i cry...

i've heard it a million times... "blood is thicker than water.."

we've all got family or at least people that we relate to as family. ever been to one of those family things like your gran's 80th or your uncle's funeral... and the real crap thing is you know nobody, your own flesh asks the same irritating dumb ass questions... so how the kids doing at school? great, my son steals money for tuck and my daughter thinks she the sex symbol for pre primaries around the world. you still working at the same place? aah ya it's hairdressing, if you move you loose clients, so i'll still be there next time we chat (2008) you still live in the same house? like i can afford to move. oooh yes and my all time favourite.. so you haven't met anybody new? to which they always seem to think one of two things, either they know some one really nice or that i'm reaching the age that i should think about resettling and getting remarried... aaaargh! do i look unhappy on my own, coz it's probably the hang over you're seeing!!
so i'm sitting alone in the corner, i have to, there's nothing worse for me than sitting with 4 couples, all happy to spend their lives having dinner parties, braais and watching dvds, it's all these perfect lives that you see in the movies...
please tell me i'm not the only 33yr old out there who enjoys LOUD music... and happy faces around me as much as possible!

you're asleep,
your gentle breath warm on my face.
you're so close,
if i touch touch you,
would you feel?
would you leave the place of safety,
made in your dream?

you're stirring,
your moaning scares me.
you've moved away,
no longer facing me.
there's a distance.
i can't reach you.
my place of safety, now in my dreams.

you're gone,
no breathing, no stirring.
no warmth, no sound.
no safe place,
no more dreams.

like a child,
i stand in front of you.
i raise my hands,lift me up.
you bend down,only slightly.
i stand on my tippy toes,
hoping i'll reach.
instead of looking down,you look up.
the sky turning grey,
the drops start falling.
in fear,you run.
leaving me,
alone and wet...

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